The Cure - Just Like Heaven
Once upon a time a boy made a mix tape for me. Keeping in line with the times it was named after a line in Empire Records and contained such delightful tracks as "Making Plans for Nigel", "Romeo and Juliet", "Psychopomp" and of course "Just Like Heaven".
The promise that he'd run away with me (either Robert or the mixtape boy) remained alive for several years (we're up to six) and for a while there it almost happened. We got as far as Auckland before having to come back home.
Before hearing this song I was only familiar with the image of The Cure. The black hair and the lipstick. The baggy white shirts and hi-top sneakers. I knew nothing of their sound and frankly, didn't really care either. I thought it was depressing and damnit, not a scrap of plaid was to be found.
Of course as I got older I learned to appreciate the finer things in life, and after falling in love, I fell in love again and started listening to The Cure. Hey! It's actually really kinda goofy happy music at times! Who knew!?
Unofficially this was "our song". I remember one time when he was on holiday in Brisbane requesting the video be played on Juice. Ahhh, remember pre-What Now? Verge and the Coke Choice? I dedicated the video to him and as Verge introduced the video she mentioned a competition to win a trip for two to London to see the Cure play. "So you know what? Lisa and [insert name here although I'm only censoring for dramatic effect, I'm sure if you're smart enough to can figure out his name] you might like to enter and the two of you could have a lovely time in London!" I shrieked in delight at being mentioned on TV and went to call him to tell him but of course couldn't because I wasn't sure where he was. Lo and behold my phone then rang and I jumped on it, instinctively knowing it would be him. Sure enough in a phone booth in Brisbane. I babbled on to him about how it was a sign and we would win this trip and blah blah. Of course we didn't. But didn't that make for a peachy story?
This song spoke to me, fooling me into believing that it was written for us. I scribbled its lyrics all over my uni lecture notes and hugged my teddy bear tightly to my chest as I lay on my bed dribbling happily. Or unhappily. Because obviously... Why are you so far away?.
And even though he would go on to break my heart time and time again, for whatever reason I still have immense love for both him and the sentiment of the song. Both shaped aspects of my life and subsequently my personality (oh my GOD, the dramatic sulking!) and even though we did dance in the deepest ocean (at low tide), he made me scream, he made me laugh, he made me glow, he kissed my face and he kissed my hair... he also left and didn't come back. And because love isn't that easy and attempts at logic and reasoning have been thrown around... I'm still kinda waiting.
So wherever I am in life and in my head every single time I hear this song I turn into the love struck 19 year old. And it's on Singstar 80s! And I fucking nailed it on my first attempt because I sang it from a place no one else could muster. I sang it for him.